New year, let’s go

It’s not often these days that I have a moment to just sit down and write, but I figure 2016 deserves a quick wrap.  And what better time than on this New Years day, when I find myself in a ponderous mood, in a quiet kitchen, with a weird hangover (espresso martini’s will do that to you).

I’ve just finished spring cleaning the entire house.  Not because that’s how I get my kicks these days.  But because an idiotic miner bird flapped in, hid itself away, and then proceeded to crap all over everything (and I mean everything) while we spent a few days down the beach.

A house full of shit and a dead carcass.  Thanks 2016.  Up yours also.

The consensus out there is that 2016 was pretty rubbish on the whole.  We lost too many amazing talents.  Creative souls who wrote the soundtrack to our formative years.  Voices that carried us through love stories, heartbreak and adventures.  Suddenly gone.

And Donald Trump.  Donald Trump!!?  What a colossal, stupid-haired, sexist, self-obsessed, ill-informed blow hard.

< breathes deeply >

In 2016, my friends and I lost our beautiful friend Fee.  We watched her fight with the strength and grace that only Fee could.  She battled cancer – that utter fucker of a disease – with everything she had, until she was too tired and beaten to fight any more.  And one bleak day in June, we joined Jamie, her boys Lachie and Mitchell, and the throngs of others who also adored her, and said a heartbreaking final goodbye.

This year I signed a lot of papers and paid lawyers, and nearly two years down the track, received a rather matter of fact – and very official – Certificate of Divorce.  Yep.  You actually get a certificate.

I’m still deciding how I feel about that piece of paper.  I could see it as proof of a failed relationship.  A love story that went south.  A broken family.  Or I could see it as a certificate of achievement.  A neat end to a messy chapter.  Written evidence of strength and resilience, because I’m still standing.

What last year taught me is that while you can’t always choose how your life happens, you can choose how you live it, and where you direct your energy.  I’ve seen people handle divorce by staying angry and bitter, and using the bitterness as a force to drive them forward.  Surely the best way to keep things on a pretty crap trajectory, if you ask me.

Ain’t nobody got time for that.

Me?  I’m choosing to have a Coke and a smile, and to reflect on the good things that happened in 2016:  I journeyed to exotic places.  I hung out with some wonderful people, went to some amazing gigs, and danced my little twinkletoes off.  I squeezed my kids tight, and watched them grow and change. I opened up my heart again, loved and was loved back.

And I’ve got a feeling 2017 has a lot more good things in store for this divorced, sometimes potty-mouthed, mother of two.

So, (battle weary but still smiling), 2016 I give you this special salute.

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4 thoughts on “New year, let’s go

  1. Marnie, I finally (what is it? like 8 weeks later ffs) got to read this NY post. I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for making me laugh and cry. And relate. Here’s to all the single mums fighting on as best as we can!!! Up yours, 2016! I never liked that number anyway! Lots of love and strength! 😉

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